Results

Thank you for the kind words...

We just got back - the numbers indicate that it is miscarriage #2.

At least... it's not as far along as the first, so I wasn't as emotionally invested. And not being as far along means (hopefully) that it won't be as horribly painful as the first. There isn't exactly a silver lining or bright side here; that's the best I can do.

I'll probably have to go for a D&C this time which is scary. I'm getting a referral to an OB/gyn. Hopefully they will be able to address our troubles in a way my family doctor can't.

Down

I'm feeling down this morning. I am accepting that either way, the results I get later today will be bad. Either my HCG levels are going down - which means a second miscarriage, or going up - which is worse - because it would mean a possible ectopic pregnancy. I'm pretty sure there's no way this is a viable pregnancy considering that Aunt Flo has been visiting for the last 40 days (and has definitely worn out her welcome), and I've been having constant pain.

So I'm feeling miserable. I'm an optimistic person, but this past few months have really been wearing on me. It's hard to keep a happy outlook when your hopes keep getting kicked in the face.

Hubby has the flu, so he's miserable too.

And all my friends are now new moms (the ones who weren't moms already). The only people I know without kids now are 10 years younger than I am. Logically I know that maybe next time we will be lucky, and their joy has nothing to do with my sadness, but in my heart I have the useless, frustrated, childish reaction that it's not fair, and why can't that be me? I've been faking being okay and cheerful but it's so hard to keep up the facade.

Things to look forward to... we are going to the States next weekend for a mini-vacation. We are going to Mexico in November for our one-year anniversary. Neither of those things are really making me feel any better right now, but hopefully they help take my mind off the crap that my heart and my body have been going through.

I might do a giveaways list later today, but right now I'm just not up to it.

Anxious!

Oh, my. My stomach is in knots. I couldn't sleep. I can't concentrate. What's going on with me? I'm waiting to find out at least one answer (that leads to more questions)....

...And that answer won't come until tomorrow. Results aren't back yet. ARGH.

Some giveaways to take my mind off things:

For baby:

• Win a $200 shopping spree for The Baby Gift Basket Co. at Minnesota Mama's Must Haves! Wow. Ends October 31st.
• Win a soy-based Cuddle Cub from Cloud B at MomStart. Ends November 2nd.
• Win The Diaper Sprayer at The First Time Around. Ends October 20th.
  

For mum:

• Win a Duffle Your Bag Standard Labour Bag at Sure Baby. Ends October 31st.
  

and if you haven't yet, go on and enter to win a great cookbook or super nice skin care here on my blog! links at top left!

Impatient haiku

The blood test is done.
We get results tomorrow.
Waiting is so hard!

____
don't forget to enter my current giveaways! an awesome cookbook and some awesome skin care. links at top left!

The list

I got a haircut today... it looks pretty good, but I decided to get some sideswept bangs (yeah, that photo on my profile is a little out of date). Now the bangs are falling in my face all the time. I forgot about that part. Hm, I should get a new profile photo!

Tomorrow's my doctor's appointment. I'm not expecting any answers but I do want to request some tests and, I think, a specialist. If you haven't been following what's going on and are interested, basically I had a miscarriage in June and now am having some health/fertility issues... lately involving trips to the ER. Not so fun and very worrisome.

Okay, on to more optimistic things - giveaways :) I've got two going on here:

$30 gift certificate to Skin Free (10/19)
and
Spice Up Your Life cookbook (10/27) (new!)

Both open to US and Canada. If you haven't entered, these are both things I have tried and loved, and I'm sure you will too. You should go enter right now!

Elsewhere -

For baby:

• Win a $25 gift certificate to Daisy's Children's Boutique and Toy Store at Buggie and Jellybean. Ends October 18th.
• Win a $75 Zutano gift certificate to their Itzy Bitzy collection (newborn clothing) at Simple. Ends October 18th.
• Two winners: a Paci Sitter or a Toy Sitter of choice from Tutimnyc at Project Nursery. Ends October 16th.
  

For mums:

• Win a Pampered Mama gift box from The Spoiled Mama at My Wee View. Ends October 16th.
• Six winners of one these prizes: three belly belts, one pair of maternity tights, one super bra or one pair of perfect fit undies from Fertile Mind at Mommy News & Views, as part of their blogiversary celebration! Ends October 26th.
• Win a Hooter Hider from Bebe Au Lait at Mommy News & Views, as well. Ends October 29th.
  

more to come... but probably not until Thursday as my hubby is taking my laptop tomorrow! See you then :)

Spice Up Your Life! Review and Giveaway!

***This giveaway has ended***
Winner: Eve

My husband and I are 'foodies'. There, I said it. It's good to have that out in the open (if you didn't guess already by my posts!). We love our food - trying new restaurants, cooking at home, baking, preserves, you name it.

We have a reputation among our friends and family that good meals are guaranteed at our house. We are also vegetarian (I am 100%; my husband is vegetarian at home, and eats meat and fish on occasion at restaurants). Far from limiting our options, I have found that having a vegetarian diet has made me a much better cook. Once you get out of the mindset of answering "what's for dinner?" with "meat and two sides", you have a whole world of opportunities to be more creative with your meals. I adopted a vegetarian diet in January of 2001 and have never looked back.

So with my love of food and interest in cooking, I'm always on the hunt for new recipes. In fact, this month alone I got three new cookbooks. Yeah, it's an obsession!

One of the books I received this month was Spice Up Your Life, by Bindu Grandhi. (I was super lucky and won a copy over at Wishing Penny.)

The book is inspired by Indian flavours, so if you love Indian food like we do, you will love the flavours - turmeric, garam masala, cumin, cardamom and coconut make appearances. If you are new to these flavours, get ready to fall in love! We find the flavours to be rich, exotic and interesting, never overpowering.

This cookbook is a proponent of a 'flexitarian' diet - which just means that "it focuses primarily on grains, fruits, and vegetables, with proteins such as seafood and poultry mixed in sparingly." (So it's not just for vegetarians like me; there are lots of recipes inside to satisfy any family's needs.) This way of eating is good for your health - low in saturated fat, high in fiber, which can help you maintain a healthy weight and reduce your risk of hypertension, heart disease, diabetes and prostate and breast cancer. Sounds good, right?

There are loads of vegetarian recipes in here, and I'm also used to adapting recipes to be vegetarian (I've been told my vegetarian tacos and burgers are better than meat versions by die-hard carnivores!), so recipes like Chili Chicken can easily become veggie meals by switching out the chicken for seitan. So for anyone, the entire book would be a great go-to book for dinner, whether it's quick weeknight cooking that you're looking for, or something to impress guests on the weekend.

The very day I got the book in my mailbox, I flipped through and immediately found a recipe to make for dinner that night. I had all the ingredients already, and it looked easy and delicious. I was not disappointed! I made the Rice Pilaf with Red Lentils. Yum! My husband loved it, too. I found the rice and lentils cooked up quickly in my rice cooker (although you don't need one, I love mine) while I prepared the rest of the meal. It was truly a 25-minute meal, filling, delicious and perfect for a weeknight supper.

You can buy Spice Up Your Life on Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, or Barnes and Noble. It's a great price and I'm thinking would make an excellent Christmas gift for the foodie in your life (or for yourself!).

I was so pleased with Spice Up Your Life and the meals we've already enjoyed from it, that I contacted Bindu to let her know. She has graciously agreed to provide a copy of Spice Up Your Life to one of my readers! Here's how to enter:

Mandatory entry:
Check out Bindu's website, The Flex Cook, and share in a comment what recipe(s) you would love to try from the sample recipes section. Please do this first!

Extra entries:

• 1 entry: follow me (publicly) on blogger
• 1 entry: add my button to your blog, or if you already have it let me know - leave your blog address, please!
  
• 3 entries: blog about this giveaway with a link back to this post

Six possible chances to win! Be sure to leave your email address, at least in your first comment, if it's not visible in your profile - and leave one comment per entry.

This giveaway is open to residents of the US and Canada, and ends at 11:59 pm EST October 27th. Comments left after that time will be deleted. I'll draw the winner using a randomizer, announce both on this post and that day's post, and also email the winner. If I don't hear back within 48 hours, I'll draw another winner. Good luck!

***This giveaway has ended***