Today

Today is my father's birthday. He would have been 65. He passed away suddenly in 2001.

I miss him every day. The hardest parts are the big events - good and bad. He didn't live to come to my first wedding. During my divorce, I really could have used his wisdom and support. For my second wedding, I'm sure he would have made the trip to Mexico to be there (my mother and stepfather didn't). When I had two miscarriages, his shoulder would have been perfect to cry on. Now that I am expecting, I miss him all the more - he would have been the best grandfather ever. It breaks my heart that he will never know, never get to hold his granddaughter.

I know loss, in so many ways. Even when you have accepted it, it doesn't stop hurting.

I miss my dad.